2003-07-18 - 11:10 a.m.
I haven’t felt like doing much. My Dad died last month. Tuesday, June 17, 2003. It wasn’t totally unexpected. He’d had throat cancer. He was undergoing chemo, and it made him pretty sick. He’d almost died earlier a few days before, but he came through it. He was released from the hospital, then went back in a few days later b/c he had double pneumonia in both lungs. Granny called mom to tell her that Dad was back in the hospital and why on Sunday since she couldn’t get a hold of me. I was at work that weekend. We called around trying to get information from someone Sunday and Monday. Monday we were told he was being moved to a hospice, and that would take some time. Tuesday we were trying to get more information as to where he was, where the hospice was, no one was being helpful. I went to work both Monday and Tuesday and so did mom. Tuesday we packed to go down there on Wednesday. We’d planned on leaving early Wed, since it’s a 7-hour drive to where he was. I wanted to be there by 12:00. I’d called Maggie earlier to get directions to the hospital/hospice. She called Mom Tuesday night to say Dad had died. Earlier, they’d thought he wouldn’t die until the weekend. Sat or Sun. Maggie was on her way home from the hospital when I’d called her on her cell phone. She was going back down there Friday. She said then that Dad was in bad shape, and that he was doing good if he recognized you. The hospice had given him a shot for his coughing and it had relaxed his muscles and he’d just died then. Didn’t sleep much that night. One the one hand, it was kinda oh, well, and on the other it really hurt more than I thought it would. We’d never been all that close. I basically saw him once a year, maybe 2-3 a year.
His family is a bunch of assholes and as far as I’m concerned they can go to hell. I’ve disowned them after their behavior towards me after he died. No one called me about anything except for that one time by Granny. It was Mom and I calling them. We called trying to get information about where it was right? Got lied to. Told he was being moved to a hospice in Town S, he stayed in Town A and was moved to the hospice at the hospital. I’m told Kim (the oh, so precious, slut, former stepdaughter of his—no blood relation at all to the Anderson family. Dad was married to their mom for several years that’s it. Kim was already in college even when they got married. She’s a lying backstabbing bitch who goes after other people’s husbands. Yup, she’s been trying to fuck her way into the Anderson family for a long time. Keith’s wife hates her cause Kim has gone after Keith. Keith doesn’t like her either. Considering her behavior, I’ve often wondered if she didn’t fuck Daddy. Bitch even showed up for the Anderson Christmas trees/parties after Louisa—her mom—and Dad got divorced. She has her own Dad, why take mine? Even after Louisa and Dad were divorced for a long, long time, she still showed up. Bitch.) Oh, yeah, I’m told Kim had the call list for the funeral arrangements! Why her? She’s not a family member. But she and Maggie, snobby bitch—Maggie—are such good friends. Slut whore bitch never called mom or me. Mom called her brother, Uncle J, who lives in Town K and is friends with the Andersons to get the funeral arrangements Wed night. No one from Dad’s family had called us all day. Oh, yeah, Tuesday night, asshole 2 called (can’t remember his name right now) Mom to tell Mom Dad had died. Wednesday night I called asshole 2, to get florist information and directions to the church for the funeral. Ass 2 also let it be known, that there was going to be a family luncheon at the church at 12—the funeral was at 2 on Friday in Town S! No one ever called me about the luncheon to invite me. I would never have known about it if asshole 2 hadn’t been drunk that night. I said thank you for calling my mom Tuesday night and he said to me “Well, I didn’t want to call her, but J (Mom’s brother) said for me to call her since it was doubtful anyone else had to tell her about Burdett.” God! Can you believe he said that to me! And the obituary that was put into the paper has to be seen to be believed. Burdett Anderson is survived by his four daughters: Michelle Anderson, Melinda (current stepdaughter no blood relation), Kim, and Annette (Kim’s sister and both are ex stepdaughter)! No, I’m serious here. That was actually put into the paper. Kim and Maggie planned it together. Talk about a slap in the face. It was in the Thursday edition of the newspaper. I’d planned on going to the funeral, but I didn’t after that. I felt no particular urge to subject myself to any further nastiness on their part. The Anderson family did everything but tell me to stay away from them. The obituary just showed their true low class, country bumpkin, trash colors and had everyone asking questions. People were calling Mom and me and asking “I thought Burdett just had the one daughter?” since the obit confused them. Yup, that’s right. Mom said at least I got top billing. I’m surprised it wasn’t last myself. The obit from what I understand has caused a backlash even in the Anderson family. Maggie is trying to distance herself from Kim and trying to blame it on Louisa (Kim’s mom). Yeah, right. I understand Kim really gave them a show at the funeral by running around sobbing, saying “What’re we gonna do now that Daddy’s dead?” Daddyfucking bitch. Uncle Jerry says asshole 2 and his son Kevin stopped by Jerry’s place and asshole 2 said “I don’t know why Michelle wasn’t at the funeral. I know she was coming.” Kevin, his son, said “It’s obvious after that obituary. I don’t blame her for not showing up. I wouldn’t have either.” Heeeheee. And can you imagine Kim’s actual dad’s reaction to the obit? Being called a daughter of Burdett Anderson? I know she had a good relationship with HER father since she was always talking about him and looking forward to seeing him at Christmas, etc. Hell, if I was him, I’d disown the bitch. I know HER dad helped her by putting her through college, buying her a car, etc. EVERTHING MY DAD didn’t do for ME. And this is how she repays him? I said to mom “Well, does this mean I get to trade? If my dad’s hers, then is her dad mine? I’d be more loyal than the one he’s got.”
I had some sunflowers sent to the funeral, and I’m told by Granny that it was the best, most appropriate arrangement. It was sunflowers and wheat stalks. Dad was a farmer/combine driver for hire. Cynthia (Dad’s current wife) who has her family in Town S, and has already buried one husband in Town S insisted on having the funeral and burial in Town S even though she and Dad had only been married about 5 years, and all of Dad’s family is in Town K, TX 7 hours away from Town S. What a bitch. Cynthia also sent me a thank you card for sending flowers to my Dad’s funeral. NOT A SYMPATHY CARD, a THANK YOU CARD. Can you believe it? NOT ONE OF DAD’S FAMILY EVER SENT ME A SYMPATHY CARD!!! Even the bitchy relatives on Mom’s side that I’ve hardly ever seen sent me a sympathy card!!!!!!!!
I’m through with the family. I don’t care anymore. After Granny dies, I won’t have anything to do them anymore. I haven’t seen Granny either since he died. I want too. Last Sunday I called her number and left a message on the answering machine inviting her over to my house for lunch. She never called me back. I’m going to try again this weekend.
All in all, I’m very upset and hurt by Dad’s family’s behavior and by his when he was alive. I tried to connect with him, but I never did. Mom always said “Never doubt he loves you.” Oh, yeah, why not? I’ve never seen it in his behavior. Gee and I wonder where my issues with men come from?!
I’m trying to make myself communicate and get out of the house instead of staying in so……..On happier notes, I’ve seen League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Okay movie, fun, but it was more just introducing the characters for the sequel. Finding Nemo was fun and funny. Pirates of the Carribean I’m in love with. I adore it. I wouldn’t mind paying to see it again. Johnny Deep is just too funny, and the movie is good.
Reading Harry Potter: Order of the Phoenix. Am I only one actually glad when that character dies? I don't like bullies. I was bullied enough in elementary and jr. high to know better.
I’ll be so glad when they are through with the construction at work. Now, they’ve ripped up the parking lot to repave it. Argh!